How to Stop Fighting Over Housework

Interview: Carol Barkes on How to Stop Fighting Over Housework.
Carol Barkes is a conflict resolution expert, mediator, national speaker, educator and bestselling author who uniquely applies neuroscience to the fields of conflict resolution and negotiations. Her expert perspective is always fresh and relevant.
Some Talking Points from Carol Barkes on 
How to Stop Fighting Over Housework:
Conflict arises when two people see things differently and/or have differing expectations about the process of getting things done. Consequently, to minimize fights about chores:

1. Talk about the process before there is an issue. Who will do what chore, when and what does that chore look like? For example, in my own relationship, my husband signed on for doing the laundry. However, in my mind that meant getting it washed, dried AND put away. In his mind it meant washed, dried, and put on the living room chair to be picked through as needed. Clarifying all details of the process is key.

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The Manager’s Role and How They Can Be Effective

Interview: Carol Barkes on The Manager’s Role and How They Can Be Effective.
Carol Barkes is a conflict resolution expert, mediator, national speaker, educator and bestselling author who uniquely applies neuroscience to the fields of conflict resolution and negotiations. Her expert perspective on communications in the workplace and home is always fresh and relevant.
Some Talking Points from Carol Barkes on 
The Manager’s Role:
  1. A manager will be most effective if they teach their employees to think about thinking. Instead of telling employees what to do, effective managers should walk their employees through the process of solving their own problems. By doing so, they gradually are not needed for decision making as much, thus empowering their employees and freeing up their own time for more productive endeavors.

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Signs Someone Is Emotionally Unavailable

Interview: Dr. Colleen Cira, Psy.D. Dr. Colleen Cira is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who specializes in Women and Trauma, and has worked with hundreds of people struggling with their relationships and maladaptive relationship patterns, including emotional unavailability.

Talking Points for an interview with Dr. Cira on Emotional Unavailability:

Signs that indicate someone is emotionally unavailable:

1) Inconsistent communication. When someone is genuinely ready for a relationship, they aren’t going to play games. They are going to be honest and direct, they will make an effort to see you and they will expect you to do the same. So when someone is being inconsistent in any number of ways: taking forever to respond to you at one point, but immediately replies at another point; being vague about their level of commitment to you and the relationship; seeming to avoid certain topics, etc, something is up. Gently confront them about their inconsistencies, from a place of genuine curiosity, but if they can’t/won’t acknowledge what’s going on and talk to you about it, move on.

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How to Be a More Outgoing People Person

Interview: Carol Barkes

 

This comes from a communications expert, Carol Barkes. Here are some talking points for an interview on how to be more outgoing:

1. Smile more. Sometimes being outgoing is really just being about being perceived as outgoing. A simple way to seem more approachable is to practice a genuine smile. This is a smile that activates the muscles around your eyes—not just your mouth. The easiest way to get one is by thinking of someone or something that brings you immense happiness and joy.  For instance, I think of the day my son was born; it was magical. This smile generates trust in the brains of those with whom you are interacting. Our brains are always assessing whether someone is a friend or a potential threat. With a genuine smile, we seem more approachable, friendly, and outgoing.

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How to Negotiate Medical Bills

Interview: Carol Barkes

 

This comes from a communications expert, Carol Barkes. Here are some talking points for an interview on how to negotiate medical bills:

1.Make yourself have the difficult conversation.Many times, people avoid communicating about bills that they cannot pay. This makes their position much weaker and potentially escalates the bill to a collection agency. Instead, have the difficult conversations and be honest about your capabilities to repay. Your honesty and lack of avoiding the situation will typically create a more collaborative relationship with the provider.

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7 Tips for Discussing Your Elderly Parents’ Estate Plan

Available for Interviews: Glenn Matecun.

Glenn R. Metecun, CELA, is certified as an Elder Law Attorney by the National Elder Law Foundation. Here are some talking points on how one can engage in a thoughtful and crucial conversation with his or her elderly parents on estate planning:

5 Ways to Fine-Tune Workplace Communication

Interview: Carol Barkes on Workplace Communication.

Carol Barkes is a conflict resolution expert, mediator, national speaker, educator and bestselling author who uniquely applies neuroscience to the fields of conflict resolution and negotiations. Her expert perspective is always fresh and relevant.

Talking Points from Carol Barkes on
How to Fine-Tune Workplace Communication:

Effective communication is an integral part of having positive, successful interactions with the people around us. For some, good communication skills seems to come naturally, and that’s great. But for others, it is a challenge to communicate in a way that both articulates our thoughts and doesn’t rock the boat. Poor communication can lead to arguments, loss of opportunities, hurt feelings——and the list goes on and on. In the workplace it could mean conflicts with the people we work with and for, loss of credibility, a decrease in production, and other negative-affecting career circumstances. Here’s some tips on how to fine-tune workplace communication:

1) Conflict in the workplace is similar to family conflict in that conflicts can build over time as people have continual negative interactions with a person. Consequently, when a situation arises with someone we’ve had problems with in the past, it is very easy to blow the current problem out of proportion. It is important to try to look at each occurrence with its own lens so past experiences don’t negatively bias our approach.

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How Women Can Do Better at the Negotiation Table

It seems that men have the advantage over women when it comes to negotiation in many business situations. Here are just a few tips that can help women—or anyone, really—on how to approach these situations and be in a better position to achieve the business outcomes you are aiming for.
Carol Barkes is a conflict resolution expert who helps couples who are considering divorce.  She knows these bullets below are surefire ways to put a marriage on the path to divorce. Carol is available for interviews.
  • Women are less likely to negotiate than men. Women are more likely to negotiate for other people, if they do so.  This being said, women need to remember that they, too, are worthy and deserve a voice for themselves.  Most everything can be negotiated so why not try?  At the worst, we are no worse off than before the attempt.  Continue reading “How Women Can Do Better at the Negotiation Table”

How to Increase Your Chances for Divorce

Divorce is not something anyone is hoping for when they get married. But, unfortunately, many people end up sabotaging their relationships and increase likelihood of divorce.

Carol Barkes is a mediator who helps couples who are considering divorce.  She knows these bullets below are surefire ways to put a marriage on the path to divorce. Carol is available for interviews.  

1) Criticizing your partner. There is no such thing as constructive criticism. Criticism is just that, and it is hurtful. Instead, separate the person from the problem. It is okay to have a complaint about a process, but keep it to what is happening and then move forward to what you would like to see happen differently.

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What Makes Employees Fully Engaged at Work?

Years ago, people would get a job and stay with it for years; possibly until retirement.  Today, we live in a much different environment where employees look for jobs that align with their values and easily move to other companies, if the environment doesn’t suit them.  Consequently, it is not unusual to see employees change jobs as regularly as every couple of years, if not more frequently. On the flip side, some employees stay in their positions but lose their passion for performing at peak levels gradually over time.  So what are some things employers can do to keep employees engaged and dedicated to their organization?

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