Interview: Dr. Colleen Cira, Psy.D. Dr. Colleen Cira is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist who specializes in Women and Trauma, and has worked with hundreds of people struggling with their relationships and maladaptive relationship patterns, including emotional unavailability.
Talking Points for an interview with Dr. Cira on Emotional Unavailability:
Signs that indicate someone is emotionally unavailable:
1) Inconsistent communication. When someone is genuinely ready for a relationship, they aren’t going to play games. They are going to be honest and direct, they will make an effort to see you and they will expect you to do the same. So when someone is being inconsistent in any number of ways: taking forever to respond to you at one point, but immediately replies at another point; being vague about their level of commitment to you and the relationship; seeming to avoid certain topics, etc, something is up. Gently confront them about their inconsistencies, from a place of genuine curiosity, but if they can’t/won’t acknowledge what’s going on and talk to you about it, move on.