Interview: Dr. Colleen Cira, Psy.D.
Dr. Colleen Cira is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist as well as the Founder and Executive Director of Cira Center for Behavioral Health, PC. She is an anxiety and trauma expert as well as a consultant, supervisor, speaker, writer and advocate.
Talking points for an interview on what to do when your partner is fighting with their parents:
1) Do not try to fix the problem.
We’re often uncomfortable when we see someone we love hurting and it’s human nature to want to make it better in order to take away their pain. Unfortunately trying to “fix it” is a) often not possible, and b) often minimizes our partners feelings about it. Just listen.
2) Do not offer a strong opinion.
If your partner is really mad at their parents and expressing all sorts of anger, it makes sense that you might feel angry at their parents too and want to express some of that. There is very likely a place for that at some point down the line, but not right now. Right now your focus is on your partner and how THEY feel, NOT how you feel. Keep your partner’s feelings are the forefront. There will be time for yours later.
3) Do not bash your partner’s parents
Your partner may want to call their parents every name in the book, but that does NOT give you permission to do the same. You are likely coming from a place of good intentions and may even think you are validating your partner’s concerns, but saying negative things about their parents is not a great way to achieve these things. When this fight is over, their parents will still be their parents and now you’ve said some negative things you can’t take back. Stay neutral, not negative.
Available for Interviews: Dr. Colleen Cira, Psy.D.
Dr. Colleen Cira received both her Masters and Doctorate from The Illinois School of Professional Psychology and is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist in the State of Illinois. She’s the Founder and Executive Director of Cira Center for Behavioral Health, PC, a boutique group practice specializing in Women and Trauma with locations in Chicago and Oak Park.
She was named one of the “Top 100 Women in Chicago Making a Difference,” by Today’s Chicago Woman. Dr. Cira is a trauma and anxiety expert, clinical supervisor, writer, speaker, consultant, activist, wife, and Mommy to two little ones.
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